Gone (Chinmay)

Description: The memories played in her head like glorious visions, but they left her feeling empty and cold, and as much as she tried, she couldn't get more then a fleeting feeling - like taking a breath before she was plunged back underwater.

Characters: Jinmay and Chiro

Gone

Tauria

For those first few days, the pain was nearly unbearable. Every little thing reminded her of him. His face would jump out in crowds. The breeze was like his touch, the sun his caress. Pictures brought tears to her eyes. The silence sent pangs to her chest. She woke up crying in the middle of the night, because she was all alone after a nightmare. The memories played in her head like glorious visions, but they left her feeling empty and cold, and as much as she tried, she couldn't get more then a fleeting feeling - a breath before she was plunged back underwater.

Her smile had left for a while, replaced with only a shadow of the former brilliance. Her laughter was forced, and every breath was taken as if someone was pushing her shoulders down and sitting on her chest. Her chest felt empty, as if when she was crying she had somehow cried her heart out. Swallowing was a painful ordeal, as if her throat had swollen with the choked back tears. Not a day went by when her eyes weren't red-rimmed from the hours she spent curled into a ball.

Eventually, her smile came back in full brilliance, and her laughter filled the air again. Breathing was easy, and her heart had filled up around the hole. She no longer choked back tears at evey little thing, enjoying life the way she had when he had been such a crucial part to her life. She slept each night, and could hum again when she cooked.

The memories, as fleeting as they were, brought smiles to her face, and she no longer wished for them to last forever - it was time for her to move on. She smiled at the pictures on the wall, chuckling at the scenes.

She went out again, enjoying her girls night out with her friends. She had dinner with her friends - her family - and didn't end up a sobbing mess when mention of him was brought up again. Yet despite all of this, she didn't enter the dating world again. What they had once had was something special, and she wasn't going to move on from it anytime soon.

But once every year, she let the grief and memories wash over her like a blissful, calming wave.

She wore the dress he loved to see her wear, and packed a light picnic lunch. She ate it in their favorite spot, watching the children play and making shapes in the clouds. Then she would pack up and walk around, swinging the basket at her side, and imagining how he would tease her if he was there. After that, sometimes she would see a movie, other times she would go and get the ice cream they always shared. But when the sun began to go down, the routine was always the same.

Red, yellow, orange, and pink decorated the sky as the sun began to sink below the horizon. The light was just bright enough for her to make out the words in front of her. Tears swam into her gaze as she sat down, photo album in her lap.

"Hey there," she smiled. "Can you believe it's been a year already?"

No, I can't. It's like it was yesterday...

"What I have a hard time believing is that today is the five year mark. Five years, Chiro, since we were last together."

You don't count this day each year?

"Silly! Of course not!" she giggled lightly, a tear slipping down her cheek. She opened the photo album to a random page. "Remember this?"

You mean Sprx's race against all those famous pilots at the Shuggazoomian fair? That he won? And then Otto won the hoverburger eating contest? That was a great day...

"Mhm! They walked around showing off those medals forever. I was shocked that Nova didn't knock Sprx into next week!

Memory after memory was recounted, with her head filling up the silence between her sentences. She knew him well enough to know what he would say. If she closed her eyes, it was almost like he was there with her again. She could feel his touch, hear his laughter, see his smile. If she imagined hard enough, it was as if she could smell his scent on the air.

By the time she packed up, the moon was high in the sky.

"I'll be back next year. I promise," she whispered, before turning and leaving.

Behind her, the moon created an eerie glow on the statue of a twenty-something version of Chiro, standing in a heroic pose. The most distinguishable words in the moon light read:

In Loving Memory of Chiro, Shuggazoomian Hero